Vegan Hope

For those of you who don’t know, for the past month I have been running an online community called “Vegan Hopefuls”. It is a group of people who are either wanting to learn about a vegan diet/lifestyle or vegans who want to be healthier. The group has been awesome this month. I have done this a couple of times, and each time I learn a little more, mostly about the power people have when they decided to make better choices.

This month (health wise) our group lost 198 pounds, 2 people went of cholesterol meds and 2 people are now off diabetes meds! We had people completely give up: sugar, salt, processed oil and caffeine. There were 5 people who were not vegan at the start but now are completely vegan (and loving every moment).

I am so proud of this group and what they have been able to accomplish.

I won’t be running another Hopefuls group for a little while, as I start classes at Cornell next week to get my certificate in plant based nutrition.

In the mean time, know that a month is long enough to change your life, change the way you think, and change the way your body feels. Every day make choices that mean compassion and health.

Thank you to all of you who participated in Hopefuls this month! You have all taught me a great deal, and I wish you so much more awesomeness in the future!

People will often ask me where I stand on animal rights and where it fits into my health and diet. It’s interesting, I started out going plant based, I eliminated animal products because I found out they were harming my body, they were poisons. I started to read more, and eventually got into reading a lot about the animals that I was once consuming.

Up until I decided to be vegan , eating was only about me. It really had nothing to do with anyone else. It wasn’t hurting anyone except for myself, it wasn’t giving anyone else diabetes, giving anyone else high cholesterol, or making anyone else obese. I used to think of eating as something that was very personal, something that only impacted me.

It wasn’t until I decided to go vegan did this start to drastically change for me. I think as a society we separate eating and who suffers so much that we’ve become completely separated from the food on our plate. This started out for me as a journey of health, I really never questioned if my body was built to consume animal products. I never really thought about things like the chemicals that go into the food that I eat, I was just a passive participant in my life, and in the food choices I made.

This was absolutely the case with how I selfishly thought that the way I was eating was only impacting me. Sure, on some level it was impacting my loved ones, my family and my friends – they had to deal with me being sick for a long time, but that was almost easy to dismiss, I still wasn’t directly harming them.

It wasn’t until I read “Skinny Bitch” that I made the very harsh discovery, that the way I was eating was directly hurting something. The way I had been eating was harming, torturing and killing hundreds of animals. Thankfully, I had already given up animal products when I read the book, because honestly? It’s a heck of a lot easier to learn about animals and how they are treated and killed, when you are not eating them.

Admittedly, prior to becoming vegan I was never an ‘animal person’. Sure, I loved my friends’ dogs and cats. And I loved our family cats, but that was about it. And I never once made the connection that there was not any difference between my good friends dog, and the animal products I used to consume.

Reality hit me one day while I was reading a news article about a man who was sent to prison because he abused and killed his dogs. I was horrified. It wasn’t because I had this immense love of dogs, it wasn’t because I first had to understand some really profound principle regarding animal rights, before I felt any sadness for what happened to these defenseless and beautiful creatures. It was because, it was a simple answer, there was no question in my mind if these animals had feelings, or felt pain from what this man had done to them.

All of a sudden it became painfully clear of what my prior way of eating had caused. And honestly, the thought that my overindulgence was the cause of so much death makes me completely ashamed.

It’s a strange thing for me to be consistently losing weight now.  I had put so much weight on due to my selfish indulgence, and now as I shed that, I feel as though I am shedding part of something much bigger than weight, I’m shedding the way that I used to look at food as a whole. I’m shedding parts of me that took years and years to become.

For me the weight and the animal rights part of my life are so closely connected. The weight that I have represents something very dark, and a lot of things that I wish more than anything I could undo. Being able take this weight off is not just a physical burden being lifted, but also a very deep emotional and painful burden being lifted.

I wish I had made the connection so much earlier in my life. The way I was eating was causing pain and suffering. As someone who has always thought of myself as a champion for things like social justice and peace, I participated in the needless suffering of other living creatures, by the food that I ate every day. I would march in peace protests, but eat an animal for dinner; I’d champion for the rights of others, but consume products that meant torture.

Losing weight has been a painful process for me in a lot of ways. I hate what my weight represents. And so the two have become intertwined in a way that I was not expecting them to be.

There is no reason to let another creature suffer in order to fulfill our selfish desires. There is a simple reasoning, either an animal suffers, or it does not suffer, I don’t think there is much else to it. And it doesn’t matter how that animal was raised, if it was grass fed or if it was in a factory farm, the animal still experiences a brutal and horrifying death, a death that is then consumed.

I consumed death for most of my life, and a little over a year ago I made the decision to stop. There is something that goes far beyond health when you become vegan, something that I was not expecting. I have and feel more life than I ever have; I make decisions, thinking about how it will impact other creatures, whether that is my food choice or my clothing choices. In turn I’ve discovered life in an entire new way. My life does not center around death the way it once did, it now centers around life, and treating all life with respect and love. It has made a difference in my life that I am profoundly thankful for, and hold onto so much hope, that if someone like me could drastically change my perception of the way I lived my life, that others can and will make the same choice.

A few months back my husband was featured in Veg News in an article talking about different excuses people had for not being Vegan. He really did have a good excuse, as far as excuses go – he is allergic to plants. I should clarify, he’s allergic to all raw vegetables, fruits, nuts and a handful of other random things and we really thought it would be impossible for him to be a healthy vegan.

It took us six weeks to figure it out. And he’s been completely plant based for over 6 months now. It started when he saw what was happening to my health, and then he started to learn exactly what an animal based diet does to the body. He’s passionate about it now, like me, it started as a health quest, and became a lot more. The truth is that it’s a lot easier to learn about what is being done to animals when you are no longer eating them.

Health wise as a couple, so much has changed in a year that it’s hard to imagine we were ever any different. We obviously love each other A LOT, we always have, and I think it has been out of that love that we were able to make the changes we did. It was out of a tremendous, non judging love that we could talk openly about what we were learning, the struggles, the questions we had, especially when it came to some of the ethical things we were learning about.

Of course, it was out of a huge love for each other, that we seek constantly to be as healthy as we can. We’re always adjusting, and learning and aiming for the healthiest life we can live. We work out, we learn how to make new meals, we learn to laugh when things don’t go our way.

It was about a year ago that we moved away from the Washington, DC area. We both needed to do it. We had spent 5 years battling my disease together,  not focusing on anything else really. It was tough. We made it through, we still laughed every day, hugged every day, and even in the worst of what we went through, our love just kept growing.

I don’t think we could have had any clue seven years ago on February 7^th when my husband proposed to me, what we’d go through as a couple, and how much we’d stretch, grow and change, all in amazing and beautiful ways. We’re always talking, always figuring things out together, always asking ourselves about our dreams and how we can be even more awesome. (ok maybe we don’t say it just like that, but we are pretty awesome).

My husband is my hero. He is by far the strongest man I have ever known, he has never once become angry at some of the bad situations we found ourselves in, and he has never once said a discouraging word. I don’t think I could have been more lucky that the day he got on one knee and asked me to marry him.

Today we just keep going, we learn, we talk, we encourage one another, most importantly we never give up. This past year we’ve changed every thing – together. We took a lot of risks this past year, and each of them were completely worth it. If you had told me 7 years ago that one day we’d be traveling full time, hiking on cliffs over the ocean, that we would have fought a horrible disease, that we would have learned an entire new way of living life, that we would have discovered together who we could be if we really challenged ourselves, and of course, that we would become Vegan – well honestly, I could have never even imagined any of that seven years ago. I didn’t know to reach so high, I didn’t know that it was ok to challenge and challenge and then challenge some more. I didn’t know that life was able to be shaped so beautifully, and that in the end, it’s all about our choices. At some point, my husband and I made a choice to be active participants in our life, not passive participants, just watching it all go by, accepting disease, accepting pain, accepting the way things were. We became active participants, moving through life in a completely different way, being aware that the way things are, even if at times, seems really impossible – can always, always change. And now, we just keep learning.

I’m so proud of my husband, on the health side of things, I’m not the only one who is rocking it. Together, as a couple? We have lost 163 pounds. My husband’s allergies continue to improve, and some other health concerns just keep getting better.  He is filled with life, bright, bold and beautiful life… And I can’t wait to see what the years ahead hold for us, I have a feeling, that as long as we keep dreaming and aiming high, the adventures that are ahead of us will just keep getting better.

the boot

Seriously, this boot thing is getting old. The past few days I was completely down about it, feeling like everything has been on hold, waiting for my foot to get better. I have been going to the gym, just working on upper body, I’ve been doing abdominal work and some boxing, but still, I feel like I’m missing out.

It’s been a giant pity party over here, that was until I talked to one of my favorite people in the world, my Aunt Leisel.

So, first you should know that Aunt Leisel is awesome and you would probably love her. She is actually an Aunt on my husbands side, but we didn’t even meet her till this past year. We had communicated a bunch via e-mail and the internets, which was awesome.

And honestly, I’m pretty sure that I would not have been able to get through the past year if it weren’t for her. She has been the most encouraging person in our lives. When we visit she accommodates us with completely loving and open arms. It’s like being at home, we’re completely comfortable and taken care of when she’s around (well and her wonderful and loving husband .. Uncle Gregg). When I tell her something I’ve done – she bursts with joy, if I tell her I’m having a hard time with something, I know she’ll be there, she is constantly encouraging not just me, but my husband as well. Often, I don’t think she even knows how much she means to us.

And I haven’t even told you about her daughter. My Aunt adopted a LOT of children, one of these beautiful children had pretty severe disabilities (she still does). It is a full-time job for my Aunt, and you would think she would be bitter or down about it, but she never is – she is always upbeat and hopeful. Her daughter is my age, and requires 24/7 care and my Aunt has really made the best out of a situation that I don’t think many thrive in. And her daughter? I think she might just be one of those shining lights in the world that doesn’t come by very often. Her smile, seriously lights up a room.

They have been really working on health this past year, and they all have been doing awesome at it. In the midst of me being all down and depressed about my foot, Aunt Leisel was telling me about her work out routine and her daughter’s. I found out that my cousin (her daughter) has been working out an HOUR a day. AN HOUR PEOPLE! Here I am complaining about my stupid foot, and there she is working out hard every day. Seriously? Despite all of her ‘limitations’ she knows it’s important to be healthy and move, and her health is greatly improving because of it.

It was a reminder to me to be thankful and to be a shining light in this world, no matter what. It was a reminder that there are people out there that would love if there only trouble was a hurt foot. It was a reminder that there are bad circumstances, and it really just depends on how we choose to look at them, and to overcome them. I was thinking about my Aunt today and thinking how she could just be down all the time, she could just be upset about her circumstances, but she chooses not to.

I’ve decided to make this a much bigger part of my life, choosing to find the happiness and hope in every thing that I’m doing. On the bad days, the just ok days, and the good days. I want to make the most out of my life, even when I feel like life is not being so fair. Because, in the end? Life isn’t fair to many people, but I think we all have that moment when we can choose to be that smile that brightens up a room. And in the end? I think that might be what makes the biggest difference.

I wish you could all meet my Aunt, Uncle and cousin – and just pocket a little bit of that love and light that they all have – I think the world would be a better place for it.

The past few weeks have been a lesson for me in being and remaining positive. For whatever reason I’ve had a large number of negative e-mails and correspondence with people.

This also comes with some good and bad news for me – I hurt my foot… but in doing so I was able to get a very good picture of my foot health. As you know, last year my feet were in bad shape. Diabetes was taking its toll on my feet. Neuropathy was a bad problem for me, pain, numbness, tingling, arthritis and very jagged and rough bones at the top of my feet.

It was not a good situation, and one that I never though could be reversed. Talking to several diabetics since going plant-based, who are also plant-based, I knew that neuropathy and damage is something that can indeed be helped even healed with a healthy plant-based diet. I knew my feet were doing better, no more pain (well except this recent injury), no more numbness, tingling or severe cramping. Yet not till yesterday did I know how much my feet had healed. A detailed look at my foot shows that there are no more rough bones at the tops of my feet – they are completely smooth. The doctor was really encouraging, telling me that my feet don’t show any signs that I have/had diabetes. This all in a year.

It’s fantastic news. News that should be celebrated. Yet, in the past few weeks, it seems that I have been getting a big influx of people who just don’t want to believe any of the healthy plant-based talk at all. They say it’s ridiculous, that it can’t work, that diabetics can’t eat carbs, that it’s dangerous, that it can’t work, that it’s not a cure.

It’s funny, most people, when I ask what their personal experience was with a healthy plant based diet, they usually tell me that they have not tried it, or if they did – they explain a way of trying it that would even drive me insane. People who expect it to work overnight, not be a challenge in anyway, or people who want it to be as easy as popping a pill.

I have had a hard time with all of it – people who have high blood sugar numbers who not just eat an unhealthy animal protein diet – but an unhealthy – highly processed foods diet – just in general. I have had people e-mail telling me that a cure is not a cure unless we can eat and drink anything we want with out it having an impact on us at all. Excuse me, but really? That’s bull.

I would highly doubt that if someone gets lung cancer as a result of smoking that we would tell that person “HELL! Keep smoking, you shouldn’t have to give that up just to help cure yourself! Medicine will find something – someday – ummm I hope?” Or better yet – just smoke, because we should not have to refrain from things we love to do. We should just find a cure for it, so we can do whatever the hell we want.

This is the trouble with Type 2 diabetes. It is a lifestyle disease, it is caused by the unhealthy lives we live, yet we don’t want to really talk about that. We don’t want to think that we did it to ourselves, that there is a cure, but we missed it – because we really didn’t want to hear that it could possibly have something to do with the way we eat and drink.

Honestly, it’s the trouble with a lot of preventable disease. People want to consume whatever they like with no consequence, but when the consequence happens, they do not want to change their lifestyle, because it’s just too  (fill in the excuse). Of course, as someone who used to take part in this kind of lifestyle, I would have never said “I want to eat whatever I want with no consequence.” Instead I would make excuses, say that it’s not fair, that other people don’t gain weight or get diabetes from eating the way I do. I’d play this never-ending game with myself, trying to convince myself that things in moderation were just fine, or things that were unhealthy were even okay every so often. I feel the same way about bad food as I do cigarettes – I would not tell someone to smoke in moderation, nor eat bad food in moderation.

The only reason we think we have a right to bad foods is because we’ve been marketed to in such a way that we believe we have the right to eat bad food, and then we have the right to medication that will fix our bad food and non working out ways. I know this, because I used to think the same way, even if I didn’t admit to it.

We are constantly marketed to. Constantly told things are not our fault. We have the highest rates of disease in this country, diabetes, obesity, heart disease and cancer – yet we don’t want to look and ask what is it that we are doing and why isn’t anyone looking at the obvious? We eat A LOT. We eat a lot of processed foods, we eat a lot of animal products, we eat so many things that are made in a factory somewhere. We are not eating food anymore, we are eating manufactured tastes.

Somehow, a lot don’t make the connection. And I don’t blame most people. Honestly, the way we are marketed to, the way most doctors are taught – no wonder why we have the troubles we do. We’re told over and over, not only can we not change it, but it’s ok, keep eating the way you want, surely medications will catch up, surely there will be a pill that prevents you from having high cholesterol, diabetes, obesity, surely, there is an answer that is not found by changing the lifestyle you have become accustomed to.

I’m not sure why eating a healthy plant-based diet has so much negative response. Why people react the way they do to eating things like vegetables and fruit. And I think this is when we have to stop and ask ourselves, have we let ourselves become programmed by programming? Have we watched one to many commercials about something quick and easy? Have we been told by too many morning talk shows that losing weight and preventing disease is “easy” and you can still “eat anything you want to”.

Maybe it’s time for a wake up call. A call to really do research to really understand about the body and the way it works. Maybe it’s time to become your own doctor, and not rely on the medical industry to come up with a cure for our bad habits. We have lost the sense of responsibility when it comes to our bodies, as a society. We are constantly looking for a cure, when the answer is in front of us, the answer is not out of reach, and does not cost billions of dollars.

Until there is a magic pill that will instantly cure every major disease, maybe it’s time to do the next best thing? Get your health in order so you don’t have to take any medication, so you are in control of your body again, so you understand every thing that goes into your body, and the impact that it will have. Food is medicine and medicine is food – what you put into your body either heals it or hurts it, and it is up to us to figure out, and finally be honest with ourselves on which is which. I think most of know the truth about it, most of us know what is bad and what is good. For that matter I think any five year old could tell you that McDonald’s is bad food and a piece of fruit is good for you – food. Yet a lot of us actively choose things that only make us more sick.

Perhaps the problem is deeper. Perhaps, like myself at one point of my life, I ate the way I felt – I felt like crap, I ate crap. I didn’t care about myself or my body, and deep down I didn’t want to get healthy, I just wanted to get that temporary high I got and satisfaction from eating bad food – and screw the rest.

Even when I became a diabetic I looked at all of these other answers that would allow me to continue eating things like cheeseburgers, I just wanted to do what I wanted and I didn’t want anyone to tell me otherwise.

Thankfully, I finally got an almost too late wake-up call, in the form of hearing the words “partial amputation”. It was at that moment that I had to stop every thing and ask myself not only did I want to live, but did I want to thrive. Did I want to suffer or did I want to live life? I had been told over and over that I should not have to alter my behaviors that much, that I should still be able to eat a lot, and indulge from time to time. But that got me nowhere – except in a doctor office, sobbing over the fact that I was not getting any better, just worse.

I remember three weeks after I went plant-based. I hated the first three weeks – I thought it was impossible. I went through withdrawal like a drug addict, I acted like a child. I wanted to eat certain things more than I wanted to lose the diabetes. I complained a lot, said it wouldn’t work – looked at ‘unhealthy vegans’ who ate too much carbs or sugar and said that it wasn’t healthy. I didn’t want to accept that there was a healthy way of eating and curing myself, and no longer being on medications. I wanted an easier answer.

Low and behold, going plant-based? That was my easy answer. After the tantrum I threw, I realized that it was the easiest thing I could do. Eat simply. Eat foods that came from the Earth, don’t eat things that were made in a factory. How much more simple could I get. The answer wasn’t in a medical lab, wasn’t in my doctor office, wasn’t in a morning talk show, it was simple – the thing I put the most of in my body (food) was causing the problems I was having. Simple. Once I stopped the kicking and screaming tantrum, and calmed down, I realized that I was just trying to find ways to not eat healthy. I kept telling myself that a cure meant I would someday be able to eat whatever I wanted without consequence. I was wrong.

A cure is that moment in which you realize that you are in control of your health. A cure is when you realize there is hope, and it is in your hands. A cure is when you realize that you have more power than any pill. A cure is when you don’t have a pharmacy bill every month. A cure is when you don’t have to go further than the produce aisle or the farmers market to shop. A cure is when you don’t cause other major issues in your body from different medications or ways of eating that cause things like high cholesterol (like low carb, high animal protein diets). A cure is when it works on your entire body. A cure is when you can go off pain medications for problems you once had that left you crying after a few steps on a treadmill. A cure is deciding that your life is worth working for, that your life is worth changing a few bad habits. A cure won’t be advertised on television or at the doctor’s office, but will be right there for you when you are ready. The truth is, that there is a cure for many preventable disease, we just have to accept that they are there.

Prevent and cure – don’t wait, don’t expect a lab to fix you – expect YOU to fix YOU. Take the power back into your own hands and find out every thing you can about your health and the way you live your life. If you started by simply being honest with yourself, and asking before you ate something “is this going to heal or hurt my body” you would do yourself a world of good. Because, as I said, I believe most of us know the truth, it’s just a matter of accepting it, and getting over ourselves long enough to make the changes and find happiness and joy in those changes.

I thought I’d write a short list of some resources on plant based every thing. This is kind of just the bare bones, there are 100’s of more resources. I believe that people need to research and discover on their own, and find out every thing they can.

Do research outside of what your doctor has told you. Every doctor I had told me I needed to eat animal protein – and they were ALL wrong. Ask your dr. what they know about plant based nutrition, ask what their most recent study on it has been, as, about the studies that were done that have been de-bunked since (like on soy, and vitamin B12) ask them what they think of some of the biggest studies of nutrition and disease. How much time do they spend with you on diet and exercise? How much time do they take to explain why they are recommending eating a certain way? And lastly, are you getting a second opinion from someone well versed in plant based health?

This is your life, research as much as you can. For me, it saved my life. A little over a year ago I was on 9 meds for EVERY THING. My cholesterol was life threatening, my diabetes was out of control, my hormone levels were messed up. Now, 10 sizes smaller and on no medications I am glad that I stopped just relying on doctors to save me, sometimes you have to learn how to save yourself. It’s the best thing you will ever do, to make informed decisions.

Resources:

The China Study, Dr. Collin Campbell
-A very concise scientific summary of every thing you need to know about why going plant based is the best thing you can do for your body.

Dr. Neal Barnard

http://www.nealbarnard.org/

The Engine 2 Diet: Rip Esselstyn
- Practical guide to going on a healthy plant based diet. Filled with success stories and great recipes.

There is a Cure for Diabetes
From the Doctor behind “Simply Raw, Reversing Diabetes” a book that outlines every thing that the “Tree of Life Institute” follows for helping type one and type 2 diabetics go off of insulin. There is also a spiritual aspect to this book.

Heart Attack Proof:

http://www.heartattackproof.com/

The 30 Day Diabetes Miracle
This is the book that started it all for me. There is a lot of science and studies, as well as a very practical starting point for people.

Reversing Diabetes by Dr. Neal Barnard
One of my favorite books on plant based health. Dr. Barnard does a wonderful job in explaining exactly what will heal diabetes.

Breaking the Food Seduction Neal D. Barnard, M.D.
Also Dr. Neal Barnard great book on understanding food.

The Kind Diet – Alicia Silverstone
A book by actress, Alicia Silverstone. This book covers all the aspects of a vegan life.

The Thrive Diet – Brenden Brazier
Brenden is a super tri-athlete who has tons of information on a healthy plant based diet, especially for athletes.

Vegan Body Building: Robert Cheeke
Body builder, Robert Cheeke has a lot of information on the best way to be your best.

The Cancers Survivor Guide: Neal D. Barnard
Another great book by Neal Barnard who has helped thousands get through and survive cancer.

Skinny Bitch/Skinny Bastard: Rory Freedman
If you don’t mind some bad language and some straight talk, these are the books for you! To the point and not messing around, it’s an in your face and not subtle approach to being vegan.

Some great sites to check out:

http://blog.fatfreevegan.com/
-Veg News – Blog of the year! I love this site for healthy fat free vegan recipes.

http://engine2.org
Information and blog from “The Engine 2 Diet”

http://pcrm.org
Awesome resources and a 21 day kick start program that is completely free!

http://veganproteins.com/
All about where vegans get their protein and dispelling a lot of myths. These are hardcore athletes who know a lot about food.

http://veganbodybuilding.com
A site developed by Robert Cheeke, body builder. Great for motivation and inspiration!

http://sequelnaturals.com/vega
Brenden Brazier’s site – check out the forums, they are great.

http://www.thekindlife.com/
Alicia Silverstone’s site based on her new book.

http://vegweb.org
Tons of vegan recipes! Pretty much anything you can think of can be found here!

http://www.vegnews.com/
Great vegan magazine filled with lots of resources.

http://happycow.net
Find vegan places to eat and shop near you!

http://www.tcolincampbell.org/plant-based-nutrition/category/diabetes-and-thyroid-diseases On Thyroid health and diabetes.

http://www.pcrm.org/health/veginfo/protein.html On getting too much protein.

Documentaries/Movies to watch:
Simply Raw: Reversing Diabetes in 30 days. Amazing must watch documentary by Brave New Films: http://www.rawfor30days.com/
A must watch movie! Follow 6 people as they transform and change their lives on a plant based diet.

The Eating Documentary: http://www.ravediet.com/whatsinfilm.htm
Straight forward and very informative documentary on what you are eating.

Fast Food Nation: http://www.amazon.com/Fast-Food-Nation-Greg-Kinnear/dp/B000MEYKAU
A movie on the fast food industry, very eye opening (and kind of gross)

Super Size Me: http://www.hulu.com/watch/63283/super-size-me
Find out what  happens when someone eats McDonalds for a month. You can watch it for free with the link above!

I’ve battled other people my entire life, over my size. I don’t really remember being thin. I gained over 70 pounds in one year around the age of 11. The doctors still really don’t know why, and since then, I have battled my weight every single day of my life.

I’ve gone through hell and back because of my weight. I’ve been made fun of publicly, I’ve been humiliated, I’ve been physically hurt, I’ve been called names by strangers. I have had people stop me in the street to tell me they have some magic pill to help me lose weight.

One day I was walking to the metro, to go home from work. A car stopped short right next to me (not a comforting thing when you are in DC). This woman quickly jumps out of her car STOPPING traffic. And starts flagging me down “HI!!!!! YOU ARE FAT AND I CAN HELP YOU!!!!”
I have had members of the fat acceptance association try to recruit me. I have been asked by doctors why I let myself go. I have been told by complete strangers that they feel sorry for me.

I have been told far too many times that I’m lucky that my husband fell in love with me. People who hint that my husband is pretty amazing for looking past my weight. When we started dating we had an uphill battle with some people in our lives who did not want him dating me, because of my weight.

It’s been that way my entire life, maybe not to that extreme, but every day it seems to be a battle for me. Even over 100 pounds lighter (but still obese) I get stares, I get looks and I get comments.

There are days where it would be easier to wear a t-shirt that says “YES I know I’m fat” or “You think I’m big now, you should have seen me 120 pounds ago” or some really bad word all together. It’s frustrating, even the people who say they don’t see my weight, I have a hard time believing, it’s not because of them, it’s because I’ve been through this for 22 years of my life, and it’s hard to trust and believe anyone who tells you they don’t see your size.

I have tremendous sympathy for obese people. Not in a feeling sorry kind of way – but in a – I totally understand kind of way. The things that overweight people go through are far more than they will ever tell you or ever admit to. Most people will make fun of it, say that we should just work out or just stop eating. People have told me to pray it away, to try different diets, pills and surgery. I have been to over-eaters anonymous, weight watchers, jenny craig, TOPS, and jazzesize. I am a expert on being fat.

I think that the assumptions are generally the worst when it comes to being overweight. I have had assumptions made of me from even the most well intentioned people. When I meet someone new I become overcome with fear of if they can get past my weight. I go into doctor offices with a written out list of all the things I am doing and how much weight I’ve lost, I am constantly on the defensive.

If you are not overweight, and have made assumptions about people who are obese or overweight, I am going to encourage you to hold those assumptions. Know that MOST of the people you see who have weight to lose, know they have weight to lose. Not only that, chances are that they have tried more than you will ever try in your life, in regards to being healthy. They have cried themselves to sleep, they have contemplated ending their life, they have tried every single diet out there, they have worked out more than you could ever imagine. Chances are they are completely different than the assumptions you have made. And I promise, it’s a lot harder than you could ever know.

I wish I could say this has gone away with the vegan community. Granted, I have met some of the most gracious and wonderful people – the world outside of vegan is different all together. I would be lying if I told you that it’s sometimes hard for me to tell someone I’m a vegan because people assume that all vegans are thin – not just thin – sickly thin. There are times in which I feel that by telling someone I’m vegan, gives people this bad impression of veganism. I run through in my head the person saying “OMG I know this girl she’s vegan and she is huge!”

Granted, sometimes I get to tell my story, but there are situations almost every day that I can’t just go into my entire story. For many, I am just a fat vegan, and for many it just means that ALL vegans must be unhealthy.

Going vegan in and of itself does not promise weight loss. It will certainly help with health – eliminating animal products is one of the healthiest things you can do. But just going vegan? Won’t make you thin overnight. Learning to eat right, working out is still an important part of being healthy. Being vegan is more than losing weight – being vegan is an entire lifestyle.

Being vegan is not about my physical appearance, or my health. Being on a plant based healthy diet, is all about my physical appearance and about my health. There is a difference. And yes, you can be a fat vegan. You can be a curvy vegan, or a skinny vegan. Being vegan does not mean a certain look or a certain size. It means a certain lifestyle – a lifestyle of compassionate living. And you can be compassionate at any size, and any state of health.

I believe with out a doubt that eating a healthy plant based diet is a huge key to unlocking many health problems, including obesity. And I believe that being vegan is not a size, it’s a way to live life, a way that can include any person, no matter their religion, race, background, income level, size, shape or weight.

I’ve often used visualization in my journey of health. I do this most often in the gym, I picture myself as who I want to be in a year from now, and I become that person. The person in a year is a person who can do an extra mile on the treadmill, who can lift 15 pounds more than they are lifting right now, the person who loves going to the gym.

Maybe the person you want to be eats a healthy plant based diet, maybe they understand what goes into the food they eat. Maybe that person loves eating whole nutrient dense foods and enjoys it.

Maybe the person you want to be is disease free, is no longer obese, does not have high cholesterol, and is not putting themselves at risk for preventable cancers and other horrible diseases.

Often, we get stuck in today and we can’t figure out how we will get to be the person we are hoping to be. This thought can sabotage any efforts of learning or getting healthy. We think we need more will power, we are too addicted, we just don’t have what it takes. And then we spiral out of control.

If you are wanting to get healthy, I highly recommend living like the person you hope to be in a  year from now. Ask yourself when you eat “Is this something that future me would eat?” when you work out ask yourself “Is this a work out future me would be proud of?”

Tomorrow I am launching a month long support group. It will be by invitation only, but I will take ANYONE who is serious about getting healthy and switching to a healthy plant based diet. There will be people there who have already made the switch and who are thriving, there will be people who have never had a salad. My hope is that you will want to join because you want to work on the person you would like to be in a year from now.

There will be information on the benefits of a plant based diet, meal plans, recipe and food ideas, challenges, workouts and tools to help you get healthy. There will also be community support and people going through the same thing as you.

It’s time to make that decision that you want to be a healthier person, that you are worth it, worth learning, worth changing, worth discovering, it’s time to put down all of the ways you sabotage yourself. Make the decision about the person you want to be a year from now. It takes a step – so make it. Ask yourself what is the worst that could happen? And what is the best that could happen?

If you are serious and would like to join send me an e-mail: veganhope.natala at gmail dot com

Tell me a little about you and why you would like to join.

Someone close to me has recently started the journey into becoming vegan. They are very hopeful about it, and they are hopeful about being on a plant based diet. They have seen what it has done for me and for thousands of others, so naturally they were pretty excited. That was until a party with several of their friends.When they mentioned that they are working hard at going plant based the negative comments started flowing in. They were smart and let that fuel them to try even harder, but often people will give up because the anger and negative comments are just too much to handle.

I’ve heard of horrible stories, families who have threatened to not invite their relatives over unless they ate what everyone else was eating, a Mother who told her daughter by not eating dairy she was disrespecting her dairy farmer grandfather, a mother who told her teenager that she’d rather him stop going to church than to stop eating meat. The list goes on, and the more stories I hear, the more I am not surprised.

I tell people that the hardest thing about going plant based and becoming vegan are the people closest to you. I have not completely figured this out. Many will say that people are threatened by healthy food choices, especially ones with moral implications. What am I saying about someone when I refuse to eat animal products? Am I judging them? Am I looking down at them?

Some say that it is our very brainwashed society, years and years and billions of dollars later our society has been lead down a path of completely backwards thinking in what is acceptable eating. They say this is the reason for the anger, no one wants to believe that they have been a sucker for marketing tactics and lies.

Others say that it’s the powerful addictions to food that leads people to become angry about your food and lifestyle choices. Have you ever seen a drug addict go through detox? It is not pretty. They become angry and upset and justify their lifestyle and behaviors in every way possible.

For many, food is the drug of choice.  Beyond coffee, drugs, alcohol, and cigarettes – food is what we consume the most of. It is a part of our lives, a part of our socializing, a part of who we are as a society. Oddly enough, sickness and disease are also a part of who we are as a society, yet most people do not put the two together.

When I first went plant based I was very sick, I was losing the battle of my life. Yet, some who were close to me felt it necessary to make fun of my food choices and my new lifestyle. They would boast about eating animal products, call me names, make fun of the foods I was trying to learn to like. I took great offense to this at first, did they not know that if I did not change the way I was eating, I would suffer great consequences? At times I questioned if they cared for me at all, did they really wish that I would keep eating animal products and get an amputation? Was that really what they were hinting at? They would rather me die than for me to get better, all so that I wouldn’t prove a point that animal products were killing me?

I don’t think that is the case. I do think that by me changing over to a plant based diet, it proved a lot of things to a lot of people, things that they really did not want to have to think about.

The truth is that your food and lifestyle choices will make people think. That could be about the ethical side of things, it could be about the waste, the social justice, or the environmental side of it all, or it could be about the health implications of it all. Going plant based and becoming vegan has more implications than any other lifestyle choice I have ever come across. It covers a vast array of life choices and decisions that impact our world greatly.

The anger, to me is a reflection of a lot of emotions that get thrown on top of it all. Even if you do not continually remind people that you are vegan, just asking a waitress if something has dairy or egg in it, is enough to get people feeling uncomfortable about what they just ordered.

Often that moment of realization can lead to uncomfortable and sometimes hurtful comments. I have found it is more out of people’s own questioning and confusion that they say things that might come off as negative and mean.

So I have some advice for both groups of people:

Plant based vegans:

It’s going to happen. Especially in the beginning, and especially with the people that have known you longer. You have been one way for a long time, and to switch that up will confuse people and will make them think you are all of a sudden judging them. You have to find it in you to let it roll off of you. Know that getting angry back or making comments back will not do anything to help the situation. You can say something like “I am sorry you feel that way” or “It is ok if we do not eat together, if it makes you uncomfortable”. If it’s social media passive aggressive behavior – let’s say someone jokes about the animal meal they just had, I would encourage you to just delete the comment. If they ask about it, tell them you have other vegan friends who would be offended by their comment to you.

Be ready for the negative and hurtful comments, and know that most often it comes from a place of deep insecurity in the way that person is living their life, even if they do not want to admit to that. Be a positive example of what it is to be vegan. Bring tasty food to dinners, talk with joy about your life and how much you are learning. And do not hide from it all.

Most importantly, find people who are in the same boat as you. In every city there are vegan meet up groups! And if there is not one in your city – start one! Find other people who are on board with you. Join twitter, find thousands of vegans to connect with and talk to! Make your world bigger, not smaller.

For non-vegans:

Chances are your vegan friends are being really nice to you and not telling you close to every thing they know about the food you are eating. If you want to know about the lifestyle, just ask and I would encourage you to not only ask, but tell your friends/family members to tell you every thing they know and have learned. If you don’t want to learn, don’t ask, and don’t make comments about it, doing so does no good for you or the person that you know. Know that people who have become vegan and who eat a plant based diet have tons of reasons, that were thought about over and over, that were researched, and often that were very hard to make the switch. Especially for your friends/family who are switching to a plant based diet for health reasons – know that it is very hard, especially the first month. You making hurtful comments will only sabotage their efforts, and hurt them in the end. So if you are not vegan, offer support and love, or don’t say anything at all.

Of course I will encourage you to find out everything, understand why people go vegan, and why they go on plant based diets. So many are turning to this lifestyle for many reasons, and chances are that many of those reasons will resonate with you and perhaps you will find a reason to start looking into a vegan lifestyle.

There is a lot of emotion that goes into our lifestyle and food choices. In the end, we as people need to ask ourselves if the way we are living promotes a life that we want to live. Does what we consume reflect our love of other creatures, the earth and our body? You might encounter anger regarding your lifestyle choice, but I would encourage you to find a way to respond in love, and to continue learning and researching so that you understand as much as you possibly can about the lifestyle you have chosen.

I remember getting really upset with people who drank, did illegal drugs, or smoked recklessly. I could not understand why people would choose to continue in behaviors that not just lead to early deaths, but to years of suffering, and was so painful to the people who loved them.

Fast forward to when I got diabetes. I never thought of myself of living a reckless life. I thought I just did what most American’s did – eat what I thought I had a right to eat, and hope for the best. I would say things like “everyone is going to die” and that “I’m going to die anyway, so why not eat and indulge from time to time”. I can now say this was complete bull.

Eating recklessly is no better than smoking or drinking recklessly. You get some kind of high from eating poorly, the fast food, the animal products, the high sugar foods. It does something for the brain, otherwise you would be smart enough to not eat things that lead to years and years of suffering and dying a painful death.

Every thing that we consume is a choice. We actively choose if we want to eat things that will heal or hurt our body. Most people in our society choose to hurt themselves, to live a reckless and careless life. We lie to ourselves telling ourselves that it’s ok to indulge, that we’re going to die anyway, that we shouldn’t have to do something that does not seem the most pleasurable to us.

This now makes no sense to me. To me living and thriving and not worrying about things like amputation and blindness or certain cancers is MUCH more pleasurable than eating a fast food meal. Knowing that I can run on a beach, go for a hike, be around for my husband and those who love me, that’s pleasurable.

What I was choosing before was reckless and honestly, it was careless. It was careless of me not to think of those who loved me and what they would have to go through if I remained the way I was. It was careless of me to think that I was just going to die anyway, so might as well eat junk. The bottom line is that as long as I was consuming animal products I was choosing to live a reckless and careless life. When I found out the truth and the tons and tons of science behind what animal products did to my body, I had no excuse. At that moment every thing I consumed was a choice to live recklessly or not. Every bite was a choice, a decision about how I wanted to live and if I wanted to heal myself or hurt myself.

I don’t look at food as food anymore. Sure, I LOVE food, my tastes have changed remarkably this year, I love fresh veggies, I love the taste of food, real food. But I don’t look at food as some pleasurable, high feeling like I used to. I look at food as healing medicine. I look at food as what nourishes my body and mind. Every thing I put in should only lead to health and truly feeling alive.

Living a reckless life might feel good in the moment, you might really like that high you get from the foods you eat. You might love that high you get when you binge, or drive through a fast food place. But I promise, in the end? It’s just not worth that high. Find new ways to get high. Move your body, get active, eat living foods that nourish and heal your body. Choose a life where your loved ones won’t have to suffer because you choose to get a preventable disease. Live a life that is not reckless not just for the sake of yourself, but for the ones around you, who love you.

There are other options. Heart disease, diabetes and most cancers are not a given, they are a choice. We can choose a better life that does not involve needless suffering for years and years and years. We can choose a life that gives and supports all life. We can choose a life that is not all about reckless behaviors for some kind of cheap, temporary high.

If you have not made the switch to a healthy plant based diet, ask yourself what you are getting out of living a reckless and careless life. It is one of the hardest questions I had to ask myself, but one that made all the difference in changing the way I thought about my life and the way I treated it.

It’s time to start living and thriving, and it’s time to stop living recklessly. Make this year about you learning to love your body and to love life in a way that you never though possible, and do not let the reckless addictions get in the way of that.